Friday, June 14, 2013

A Father's Greatest Gift To His Children

At the Dad's For Life Conference held in Singapore recently, a number of participants asked the key note speaker, Gregory Slayton (author of International Best Seller - "Be A Better Dad Today" - I recommend this book to all fathers who want to make a difference to his family), how they can be a better father. They cited their struggles with the need to provide for the family, the pressures that they face in life and wondered how to juggle their busy schedule to find time with their children and how can they know that they are good fathers.

The main take away from Gregory is this - "The best gift any father can give to his children is to love their mother deeply".  When i mentioned this to my youngest daughter, she wanted to know why?

My answer is simply that unless the couple loves each other deeply, they can never be great parents.

If I do not respect, love and submit to Michelle, my children will never know how to respect, love and submit to one another, to their spouses and to others. If Michelle does not respect, love and submit to me, it will have the same consequences. 

On the other hand, when our children see how we love each other, support and protect one another, they will grow up learning by sight and experience to love, forgive, exhibit humility, mutual submission and all the good stuff that parents desire of them.

I  really can't say that my wife and I are great parents. Only my children can give us that credential. (Read my daughter's letter to me here.)

However, Michelle and I can surely and confidently say that we are great lovers. We have made and continue to make each other to be that great lover that we enjoy to be with, to grow old together and to die in the arms of.

Dr James Dobson (founder of Focus On The Family) once said, "Parenting is a guilty affair, no matter how much you do, it is not enough." (What wives wish their husbands knew about women)

My insight to his statement is this: You can work hard and provide for them, you can buy presents and even be frequently present with them, you would still fail your parental role if you did not teach them to love. 

How can we be successful in teaching children to love? 

Only one way -  by showing love. This love must first be demonstrated in the every day life of the parents - love tangibly shown between dad and mom for one another. Love beyond that peck on the cheek. Love that can overcome the storms of life. Love that can forgive wrongs. Love that cries and laughs, keeps the commitment in good times and in bad times. Love that never gives up.

Great lovers DO make great parents! 

Michelle and I know for sure. Start loving your spouse deeply today.


Your comments and sharing are most welcome. Fuel debate, share your experience and ask questions. Click "Comment" to have you say! You are also encouraged to mark your reaction to my post....

1 comment:

Lim Liat said...

I agree that the best gift that parents can give to their children is to love each other expressed in their behavior. It creates the atmosphere and model for love, honesty, trust and security where the children can grow up in.